I don’t know how it felt to grow up with me as a sister. I only know how it felt to be yours. When you were born, I didn’t know anything about being a big sister, so I imitated Mom, hoisting you onto my hips at nine years old, like real live baby dolls.
I was in first grade when Anni was born and I asked to take her in for show and tell. Somehow Mom agreed to bring her to the school. We walked around the room with you and I pointed out to everyone that pulsing soft spot on your fuzzy little head where I could see your heartbeats if I watched carefully and Marcus Sapp asked if he could pet you.
From the moment I met you I wanted two things – to take care of you and to show you off. I was still a child and we fought like children, but what I wanted most was to make you laugh and for you to never be hurt.
I often hear people say they have no real regrets because even their mistakes taught them something. I have real regrets. I regret that I wasn’t home to see you grow. I left home when you were 13 and 11 and I never really came back. I regret that I didn’t drive you to school on your first day of high school, or go shopping for your prom dress, or help you practice for your driving test, or weigh the pros and cons of different colleges with you, or the million moments that I missed in between.
Maybe I had to go. Maybe I couldn’t have become who I needed to become if I had stayed. But I should have tried harder to be with you, to be a part of it all. I’m sorry. I will always be sorry.
Now you are women – strong, beautiful, caring women. Women who are brave enough to do hard things, who make a way where none exists, who see the world the way it could be and chase after that vision relentlessly. You are women I want as my friends, but I’m not sure I know how to move forward.
For years we defined ourselves and our place within our family in contrast to one another. Maggi was the athletic and passionate one, Anni was the artistic and shy one, I was the brainy goody-two-shoes, afraid to rock the boat. We each played a particular role, and we came to know each other in those roles, but now we have outgrown them.
We are those people, and yet we aren’t those people and sometimes it feels like it’s all too much. It’s too much for me to change and you to change too. Because here is a truth I never expected to find–I don’t quite know who I am without you.
You are my history, you are woven through the threads of my life in ways even I don’t understand. But you are also my future. Because no matter where we’ve gone and what we’ve done, no matter how many moments we’ve missed, one thing has stayed the same. My truest, deepest, down-in-my-belly feelings towards you are the same. I want to take care of you and to show you off. I want you to be safe and I want you to laugh often and I want the whole world to see how amazing you are.
So I will keep trying. I will hold you fiercely inside of my heart and I will try to find ways to show you that I am proud of you, that I am dazzled by you, that I love you. But also that I want to know you, just as you are, right now, even from across the world.
Last week I mentioned that we’d intended to take a day trip to Busan and had to postpone because of the rain. This past Saturday we cashed in our rain check and headed down to the coast for the day.
Busan is the second largest city in Korea (after Seoul) and is situated on the southern coast. It is also our favorite city in Korea. We like it because, with the water, the beaches, and an actual skyline, it has a more unique look and feel than any other city we’ve been to in Korea. We also love breathing in some of that fresh sea air. We can reach Busan in 45 minutes on the KTX (high-speed train) or 1 1/2 hours on the slow train.
We weren’t in a hurry so we took the slower train in the early afternoon and made our way straight out to the coast. We decided to check out a large park called Igidae which is located on a small peninsula with a seaside path along the rocky cliff edges. From the path we were able to look back and get a great view of Gwangan Bridge and Gwangali beach, one of my favorite bits of the city.
While we didn’t do extensive research we did learn a little bit about the name Igidae and its historical significance. Like nearly every historical monument or emblem in Korea, the story behind this park has to do with a Japanese invasion.
When the Japanese invaded Joseon in the late 16th century,
they conquered Suyeongseong Fortress and held a feast
to celebrate their victory at a high, open spot that
commanded pleasant scenery. Two Korean gisaeng
(female professional entertainers) were taken to the feast.
They seized a drunken Japanese commander
and jumped into the sea
as a reprisal against the Japanese invasion of their homeland.
Thus, the name Igidae, which means two gisaeng, was given to this place.
In Jonathan’s words, “So this, like all important pieces of Korean history, is a memorial to them giving Japan the middle finger.”
The path itself was very gentle and easy to walk with the exception of the suspension bridges which naturally terrify me. It just occurred to me that maybe my real fear is cables since both cable cars and suspension bridges produce this reaction in me.
It’s actually more of the dangling that I hate so much.
There were many people out on the rocks picnicking, fishing, or just relaxing.
Quintessential Korean ajummas having a picnic on hard rocks while being covered head to toe lest the sun touch any speck of their skin.
Look at that stud!
At one point we passed what looked like a bunker built into the cliff. There was a sign explaining that these were barracks for the female divers who dove and collected sea creatures here. Then we saw these women selling said sea creatures for a fresh and tasty snack. I’m pretty sure most of these things were still alive.
We discovered a cave along the way complete with the obligatory rock piles. A naughty part of me always wants to knock those over.
We also grabbed a few pictures of other funny little Korean-isms. As we wind down our time here we’ve been putting more effort into gathering some of those things that make us laugh and say, “That’s so Korean.” For example:
English translations: “Here it is a copper mine!” The moment you’ve all been waiting for has finally come!
Two things about this – first, this man is just chilling doing standing pushups here on this railing. Second, this sign which has the distance to major international locations – Los Angeles, Beijing, etc. And then, also, Dokdo. Dokdo is a tiny island between Korea and Japan that both countries claim, but that Korea passionately insists belongs to them. “Dokdo is Korean Territory” is stamped on everything – random signs, notebooks from the stationary store, office supplies, Kleenex boxes, everywhere. I’ve heard there’s a channel that runs a continuous real-time feed of Dokdo. Dokdo is barely big enough to be called an island. It is literally two rocks in the middle of the sea. So, you know, right up there with Beijing and L.A.
On our way back for dinner we passed one of the outdoor gyms and I saw people using some of those giant hula hoops I’d seen on my hike last weekend. Blurry picture, but I was pretty excited.
We always enjoy our trips to Busan and this one was no exception. We hope to make it back a few more times before our Korean adventures are over.
If you have an adventure to share, add your link to the link-up by clicking the button below. You can participate in all of the adventures or you can just do a few – no pressure. If you missed last week’s adventure you can find it here. And if you are new to my Fifty-Two Weeks of Adventure project you can find out more about it here.
Usually I write about books I’ve read, but today I’m going to write about books I haven’t read.
Most readers keep some sort of “to-read” list, mental or otherwise, for books they want to read in the future. I’d be willing to bet that most readers also have at least a few books on that list that have been there for years without ever being read. I have my fair share of these and there are lots of reasons why I’ve never gotten around to reading those books. Sometimes it’s a matter of getting sidetracked by other books that turn into whole series and keep me busy for a while. Sometimes I have trouble getting ahold of a particular book. And sometimes I’m simply not in the right mood.
Today I’m going to share some books with you that go one step beyond “I’ve been meaning to read this but haven’t yet.” These are books that I not only have intended to read for a long time and never have, but books that I actually OWN and still have not gotten around to reading.
In fairness, I will say that I very rarely buy new or full-priced books. We have a large library, but most of our books were handed down, given as gifts, purchased from a library sale where each book cost $1-$2, or purchased with a gift card. Also, I haven’t had most of these books here in Korea with me during the last two years and I’ve done most of my reading on my kindle while living abroad. But still, I owned most of these books for at least a year before moving and never read them.
These are all books that I still genuinely hope to read, especially before adding new books to our collection.
There is a list of Kindle books on sale this week at the bottom of this post. I do also occasionally tweet or post one-day deals to my Facebook page, so be sure that you are following me there if you are interested in those alerts. You can also follow me on Goodreads if you are interested in more book reviews and reading updates.
Cloud Atlas by David Mitchell. Jonathan read this book a few years ago and really loved it. David Mitchell is one of his favorite authors and from the time he first told me about it I was interested in reading it at some point, but there just always seemed to be other things I wanted to read first. When the movie version came out a while later, I was completely mesmerized by it. It’s honestly one of my favorite movies. I think it’s fascinating and beautiful and brilliant. So now I really want to go back and read the book which I believe is even more nuanced than the movie. This book has a very unusual structure. There are six stories that happen at different points in time that are only very loosely linked to one another. The book alternates stories by chapter in such a way that you read the first half of the first story, then the second and third on up to the sixth, and then the second half of the stories are told in reverse order, starting at six and going back down to one. In other words, the whole first story is in the first and last chapters of the book. After loving the movie so much I want to read this eventually and see if and how it changes my perspective.
Prodigal Summer by Barbara Kingsolver. Kingsolver is one of my all-time favorite writers. I think she is a fabulous storyteller and her interest in biology and botany makes her subject matter and approach to her novels unique. I have loved every book of hers that I’ve read. This one is set in Appalachia and follows three separate story lines that are tied together around the theme of human love. This book was well-received by critics for it’s rich sense of place and its perfect marriage of narrative, ideas, and drama. Characters include a reclusive wildlife biologist, a city girl turned farmwife, and a pair of elderly neighbors locked in a feud.
The Known World by Edward P. Jones. This Pulitzer Prize winning novel tells the story of Henry Townsend, a former slave who is now a farmer and his relationship with William Robbins, the most powerful man in the county. After Townsend dies unexpectedly, his wife, Caldonia, struggles to hold onto all that he has built. This book is lauded for it’s straightforward look at the moral ambiguities of slavery. I suppose this is one of those books that feels weighty – worth the read, but also worth being in the right frame of mind to read it – which is why I haven’t picked it up yet.
Snow Flower and the Secret Fanby Lisa See. I’ll be honest, before moving to Korea I wasn’t hugely interested in books or movies that were set in Asia. Most people have settings or cultures they are more drawn to than others, and Asia in general wasn’t at the top of my list. But I’ve been hearing about this book for years and I bought it from the annual library sale thinking that owning it would encourage me to go ahead and dive in. Unfortunately, it didn’t (yet!). Set in nineteenth century China, this book tells the story of Lily and Snow Flower whose friendship begins when Lily is only seven years old. The two women send secret messages back and forth to one another in a secret language, using silk fans and handkerchiefs to communicate with one another about their isolation and loneliness, the rituals of footbinding and arranged marriages, and the agonies of motherhood.
State of Wonder by Ann Patchett. I’ve heard so many good things about this book. I even listened to the first 30 pages or so of this as a free sample from Audible and was hooked, but didn’t have my copy available at the time to continue reading. Dr. Marina Singh heads off into the wilds of the Amazonian jungle in search of her colleague, Dr. Annick Swenson, who disappeared while doing research for a valuable new drug. I badly wanted to read this when it first came out, but wasn’t able to get it from the library. Then I bought it at a big book sale, but somehow owning it made reading it feel less urgent. Since I didn’t have to return it, I adopted the attitude that I could read it anytime, and that resulted in my never reading it. Out of all of the books on this list, I think this is the book I would most like to get to this year.
Do you absolutely love any of these books and think I’m crazy for not reading them yet? Do you have any books that have been sitting on your shelf unread for years?
Current Kindle Deals
*As of April 10th. I use the US Amazon site. Prices may vary on other sites.
New On Sale:
The House at Riverton, Kate Morton ($1.99) I love Kate Morton’s books. Part mystery, part love story, totally worth the read.
What Alice Forgot, Liane Moriarty ($6.61). One of the best books I read last year (read my review in this post). This is the cheapest I’ve ever seen it.
Gone Girl, Gillian Flynn ($4.20) Not my favorite but lots of people love it.
Teach Us to Want, Jen Pollock Michel ($2.99) This was an excellent book about desire, ambition, and longing and the role they play in the Christian life. Read my thoughts here.
Still on Sale:
State of Wonder, Ann Patchett ($5.94) Which I wrote about above!
The Giver, Lois Lowry ($2.99) Still on sale, but for $1 more than last week.
Cinder, Marissa Meyer ($2.99). This is a YA book, the first book of the Lunar Chronicles. It is a futuristic sort-of Cinderella story, except Cinderella is a cyborg and there’s a planet-wide pandemic. Just reading the synopsis, this is not the sort of book I would naturally gravitate toward, but it came highly recommended and I was impressed. It’s clever and imaginative and I couldn’t put it down.
Cress, Marissa Meyer ($2.99). The Lunar Chronicles, book 3. This is part of the same series as Cinder.
A Prayer for Owen Meany, John Irving ($3.36) A classic. Many people list this in their all-time favorites.
Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you use a link to make a purchase a small percentage of your purchase will go towards supporting this site. This does not affect the price of the items in any way.
I wake in the early morning light, eyes gummy with sleep, warm in the bed I share with the person I love most in this world.
Blessed are you, Lord our God, King of the Universe, who gave the heart understanding to distinguish between day and night.
I curl my toes against the cold tiles of the bathroom floor, huddled under the warm spray of the shower head as the room fills with steam. I lather sweet-smelling soaps and shampoos into my elbows and scalp and between my fingers until ever bit of this body is saturated and clean.
Blessed are you, Lord our God, Master of the Universe, who has sanctified us with your commandments and commanded us about the washing of hands.
I cup my hands around a steaming mug of coffee, bringing my nose as close as I can to the liquid, breathing in its spicy warmth and comfort.
Blessed are you, Lord our God, King of the Universe, who brings about all things.
I stand for too long in front of my closet, sighing over too-tight pants and a skirt that makes me look fat, trying to choose the perfect outfit from a closet that holds more than I need.
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, who has kept us alive, and sustained us, and enabled us to reach this moment.
I walk to work through crisp, cool air, the first day the sun has broken through after many dreary ones. Walking up the hill to my school, the sun and the exertion of my body warm me enough to throw off my coat and let my arms embrace those bright, warm rays.
Blessed are you, Lord our God, King of the Universe, who makes the works of creation
I enter the quiet of my empty classroom and breathe deeply, thankful for the space, for the silence, for the emptiness.
Blessed are you, Lord our God, King of the Universe, who brings peace to the earth.
And when the quiet is shattered by my coworker and I feel irritation towards her and anxiety clawing their way to the front of my mind.
Blessed are you, Lord our God, King of the Universe, who has created us all in your own image.
I stand, I speak, I teach, I listen, I laugh, I learn, I study, I work, I eat, I drink, I walk, I breathe, I praise.
Blessed are you, Lord our God, King of the Universe, who holds our lives in your hands. Every day your miracles are with us. Your wonders and favors never cease. Your compassions are never exhausted and your kindness never ends.
_________________________________________________
This post is the beginning of a series I’d like to do on practicing gratitude. I’ve come to realize that although gratitude isn’t always something that we naturally feel, it is something essential for us to practice. This won’t be a weekly post – it may be bi-weekly or more sporadic than that. I would actually love to have guest posts for this series if any of you are interested in writing a post about things you’re thankful for or what it looks like for you to practice gratitude in your life. You can contact me at lily.e.dunn at gmail.com if you are interested.
Last weekend we were planning to go to Busan for the day on Saturday. Busan is the second largest city in Korea and it’s only 45 minutes away by high-speed train or 1.5 hours on the slow train. As Saturday approached, we looked at the forecast and realized that it was going to rain heavily starting Saturday afternoon. The appeal of Busan is that it’s on the coast with nice beaches and rocky coastlines, so being outside is essential to enjoying Busan. We knew that by the time we made it down there we’d only have a short time before the rain hit, so we decided to postpone until a nicer weekend.
Annoyingly, when we woke up on Saturday morning, it was stunningly beautiful outside. (This was only annoying because we’d cancelled our plans for bad weathe). It was cool and crisp and the sky was totally clear and blue. I decided to go for a run late Saturday morning to soak in the sun while it was still there.
I went to my usual weekend running spot – some biking/running/walking tracks along the river on the west side of Daegu. It takes about 40 minutes to get there from my apartment, which is why I only go on the weekends, but I really like this area.
View from my normal running track.
When I got to the river I decided to cross the bridge and run on the opposite side of the river from where I usually run. When I got halfway across the bridge, I glanced back the way I had come and noticed that there were steps cut into the hill (mountain?) behind me. I only thought about it for a split second, then turned around and got off the bridge to explore.
Hill/mountain I saw a path on from the bridge.
The beginning of the trail.
I started climbing and pretty quickly found myself up above my usual running path looking down on the river and the bridge below. (Sorry about the crappy photos, by the way. I wasn’t planning on hiking so I only had my phone with me and the camera on my phone just isn’t great).
The bridge I was on when I spotted the path.
You can see the track down below where I was planning on running before I got distracted.
Once I made it up above the river, I realized that the path kept going. In fact, there were numbered posts ever 100 meters or so along the trail. The post at the head of the trail was #34 (I think) and when I reached the first “peak” it was still in the 20’s so I knew there was still a lot of trail ahead. I didn’t know where the trail would lead, but I figured it would eventually take me back down and I could figure it out where I was from there. I pressed on.
I met this animal which I think was a kind of squirrel, but it had some strange rabbit-like characteristics, too, so I have decided to call it a squabbit.
About halfway through the trail, I came upon one of the ubiquitous Korean outdoor gyms. These things are everywhere. A funny thing about Koreans is that they are really interested in exercise and physical activity – hence all the hiking and gyms – but they are not interested in working out all that hard. I have almost never seen someone working up a sweat or doing anything strenuous. They will just use the equipment with no weight on it to casually do arm or leg exercises, but mostly they are just stretching and getting the blood pumping, often in very funny ways. It’s not unusual for me to walk through the park and see a man in his sixties hanging upside down from his knees on the exercise equipment to stretch his back. I encountered two more sets of gym equipment further on my hike.
The first gym I stumbled on.
I also found several of these hanging on trees near gym equipment. I can only guess it is some sort of giant hula hoop. I would have loved to see someone use it.
It’s still early spring here, so there weren’t tons of flowers or trees blooming, but I did stumble on a few bits of unexpected beauty.
The cherry blossoms are out in full force. As you can see, the sky was already starting to cloud up by this point.
After about an hour of uphills and downhills and back uphill again, I came to the highest part of this mountain and took in the view.
The trail continued on going back down, so instead of turning around I continued to follow it. Along the descent I passed several stone piles like this one, which are typically seen on the path up to temples that are built high on mountains. I’m not sure why they were here in this case, but the idea is that people add to the stack as they pass by.
About half an hour later I made it back down to the bottom, though in a different place than where I’d started. And, lest we forget that I am in Korea, here is a picture of what the bottom of the trail looked like, haha.
This week’s adventure was about what my friend Meredith calls “unplanned loveliness.” It was about being willing to get lost – to wander with no agenda – to take the time to see the world around me instead of always being on a schedule. This adventure was about what can happen when you just say “yes” to what’s in front of you instead of thinking of all the reasons to say “no.” There is beauty all around us. All we have to do is take the time to notice it.
PS – Happy Easter, everyone!
If you have an adventure to share, add your link to the link-up by clicking the button below. You can also click this button to read other bloggers’ adventures. You can participate in all of the adventures or you can just do a few – no pressure. If you missed last week’s adventure you can find it here. And if you are new to my Fifty-Two Weeks of Adventure project you can find out more about it here.
I’ve only discovered spiritual memoirs in the past few years and it was a revelation to me when I did. Somehow, I hadn’t realized this genre existed. Not only do I find these books meaningful for my own spiritual life, but discovering these books was like discovering my tribe. For the first time I found people who were writing the kinds of things I was writing – people who were working out their faith through their stories – and this inspired me to pursue writing more wholeheartedly.
If you aren’t familiar with the spiritual memoir genre, it is characterized by non-fiction stories and vignettes like a regular memoir, but these focus on some aspect of the author’s spiritual life or journey. Some are conversion stories, some are about struggling with doubt, going through dark periods, or cultivating particular spiritual disciplines.
Spiritual memoir is a genre that some people love and others hate. My husband, for example, is not a huge fan of the genre (which is a pity for me since that’s what I write). He says he doesn’t want to read about the spiritual struggles of someone who is just like him. He would prefer to read something inspirational from someone he looks up to or to read something that is teaching him facts or sharing information, not just sharing reflections on personal experiences.
I, on the other hand, have found spiritual memoirs to be transformational. I am moved by the ordinary stories of ordinary people who manage to see the spiritual woven throughout the physical world and who make me feel like, “If they can do it, so can I.” When I read about Mother Theresa it’s easy to think, “She’s so far beyond anything I could ever be,” but when I read about Addie Zierman, I think, “She’s a regular person who is a lot like me sharing some great insights about how I could live a more intentional life.”
Today I want to share my favorite spiritual memoirs. Opinions on books are always subjective, but this genre is particularly subjective because the subject matter is so personalized. I might read a spiritual memoir that is really well-written and has some great insights, but that doesn’t resonate with me as deeply simply because the author’s background isn’t all that similar to mine. My favorite spiritual memoirs are those that I see myself in. The ones that I connect with and that also challenge me. These are the books that have stayed with me – the ones that make me believe my story matters.
You can find a list of Kindle books that are on sale now at the bottom of this post.
When We Were On Fire: A Memoir of Consuming Faith, Tangled Love, and Starting Over by Addie Zierman. This book is one of the biggest reasons that I am still writing this blog. I stumbled on Addie’s blog just after her book launched and this launched me into a whole world of authors and bloggers who I connected with on a deep level. Addie’s story of growing up at the height of evangelical youth culture – when Christianity was all about being “on fire” and faith ran on an emotional high- was so eerily similar to my own that I sometimes questioned whether I was reading my own diary. She writes candidly about what happens when a faith that was measured by emotional fervor seems to burn out and how faith can mature into something real and meaningful, even when we are no longer “on fire.” It was this book that made me believe I had a story worth telling. Addie is also one of the most gifted non-fiction writers I’ve ever read. Her prose is beautiful and precise. She is a role model of mine both as a writer and as a person.
Faith Unraveled: How a Girl Who Knew All the Answers Learned to Ask Questionsby Rachel Held Evans. This book was right up there with When We Were on Fire in terms of how closely it paralleled my own life experiences. Evans’ story about coming from a fundamentalist evangelical “it’s us against the world” background and learning to be ok asking questions, even if you don’t find answers right away resonated deeply with me. I love that she actually articulates some of the really hard questions of life and faith in this book and doesn’t try to smooth them over with Bible verses or trite Christian phrases. My biggest takeaway was something Evans said at the very end of the book – that there is a difference between questioning God and questioning what you believe about God. I’ve read Evans’ blog off and on and sometimes find her tone to be aggressive or abrasive there – I suppose she is more confrontational and perhaps a bit more liberal than I am – but I have loved all of her books and look forward to reading her newest one, Searching for Sunday, when it’s released later this month.
Found: A Story of Questions, Grace, and Everyday Prayer by Micha Boyett (still on sale for Kindle $3.03). This book is so beautiful. Boyett is a poet and it shows through in her beautiful prose. This is a story for tired Christians who need to experience God in the ordinariness of life. After the birth of her son, Boyett finds that she has lost prayer, something that was always a staple in her life before, and she sets out to rediscover it. What she discovers is that sometimes prayer doesn’t look the way we expect it to. This book particularly resonated with me as a fellow evangelical who grew up and feeling burdened by the need to pray more, read more, do more. This book will probably be especially meaningful for those who feel they’ve lost themselves in parenthood, but even as someone who is not a mother I could relate so well.
Pastrix: The Cranky, Beautiful Faith of a Sinner & Saint by Nadia Bolz-Weber. This book was profound to me in many ways. I read this after listening to an interview that Bolz-Weber gave a few months ago for Krista Tippett’s “On Being” podcast. I admit that it’s not for everyone, but I am not the kind of person who has to agree with everything someone else says in order to appreciate the truths they share. Bolz-Weber is the pastor of an unconventional Lutheran church in Denver, Colorado called the House for All Sinners and Saints known for such things as the blessing of the motorcycles and the chocolate fountain in the baptismal on Easter Sunday. She writes beautifully about how she came back to faith by believing that there was a place in the Church for someone like her—covered in tattoos and recovering from addictions. One of the most beautiful bits of her book to me was when she talked about falling in love with the liturgy. She says she loved it, “because the liturgy has it’s own integrity. It doesn’t depend on mine.”
Bread and Wine: A Love Letter to Life Around the Table by Shauna Niequist. It was hard for me to know whether this book counted as a spiritual memoir, though I’m not exactly sure what other genre it would fit into. This book is about food and hospitality and about the table as a place for building community. As someone who genuinely loves food, it was moving to me to read these stories of good food and shared meals being a way to honor God for the gifts of the earth and to love the people who share our lives. While Niequiest’s other books Cold Tangerinesand Bittersweet fit more cleanly into the category of “spiritual memoir” this book about food and hospitality is my favorite. It is a feast in every sense of the word.
Leaving Church: A Memoir of Faith by Barbara Brown Taylor. I had been looking forward to this book for a long time and I was not disappointed. Taylor’s story of her call to the Episcopalian priesthood and later her decision to leave the priesthood and become a professor was full of beautiful thoughts about how the world and the church need not be enemies – separate entities that are necessarily opposed to one another. She writes beautifully about the ways she encountered God and grace outside of the church as well as inside it. Among many great quotes, here was one I particularly enjoyed since it describes my current faith journey so well, “I wanted to recover the kind of faith that has nothing to do with being sure what I believe and everything to do with trusting God to catch me though I am not sure of anything.” I am currently reading the book she wrote after this, An Altar in the World, and am very moved by it.
I have a few honorable mentions in this genre – books that I thought were quite good and well-written but that didn’t make my top favorites list because they didn’t resonate as closely with my own experience. They might, however, resonate with yours and you should check them out.
Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller. A classic. I think this was my first foray into the world of spiritual memoirs.
Do you have any favorites that I should know about? (For the record, Mary Karr’s Lit, BBT’s Learning to Walk in the Dark, Christian Wiman’s My Bright Abyss are already on my list!)
Current Kindle Deals
*As of April 3rd. I use the US Amazon site. Prices may vary on other sites.
New On Sale:
Cress, Marissa Meyer ($2.99). The Lunar Chronicles, book 3. This is part of the same series as Cinder, mentioned below.
Cinder, Marissa Meyer ($2.99). This is a YA book, the first book of the Lunar Chronicles. It is a futuristic sort-of Cinderella story, except Cinderella is a cyborg and there’s a planet-wide pandemic. Just reading the synopsis, this is not the sort of book I would naturally gravitate toward, but it came highly recommended and I was impressed. It’s clever and imaginative and I couldn’t put it down.
Station Eleven, Emily St. John Mandel ($5.99). Price has gone up a bit, but still a pretty good deal. Get it, get it, get it!!!!!! Read my review here.
A Prayer for Owen Meany, John Irving ($3.36) A classic. Many people list this in their all-time favorites.
Wild by Cheryl Strayed ($4.40) You can read my review here.
Mistborn– The Final Empire, Brandon Sanderson ($4.99) This is the first book in Sanderson’s Mistborn fantasy trilogy. Just finished this. It’s great. I wrote about it here.
The Secret Life of Bees, Sue Monk Kidd ($3.99). There’s a reason this book is so popular. It’s great.
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I’m not a very “together” person and honestly, I’ve never tried to pretend that I am. I don’t have a problem admitting that I mess things up sometimes. But lately it’s felt like all the time.
There are dozens of things I know I’m not very good at. I don’t like failing at those things, but in a way, my expectations of myself aren’t very high. I’m prepared to deal with these failures. It’s so much more discouraging to find you’ve failed at something you like to think you’re good at. And I’ve been failing like a boss.
You know how sometimes you pray for patience and then God gives you lots of trying circumstances as opportunities for you to practice? And (if you’re like me) you’re like, “Yeah, not cool, God. Not what I meant.” I feel like that’s what’s happened to me lately.
At the beginning of the year I said, “Ok, God, I want this year to be about learning wholeheartedness. I want to live with intention, to connect, to be compassionate, and to live a life that isn’t ruled by shame.” And I feel like God said, “Ok, well here’s some anxiety, and here’s some loneliness, and here’s a heaping spoonful of shame. Go ahead and practice wholeheartedness. Sucker.”
Yeah…Thanks, but no thanks.
Recently I’ve been thinking a lot about what Brené Brown calls “shame resilience.” This is the ability to accept that you’ve made a mistake without letting it affect your sense of worthiness. It’s the ability to lean into those feelings of vulnerability and silence what Brown calls your “shame gremlins” by practicing self- compassion. This is how we can admit to our mistakes and learn from them without letting our mistakes define us.
I have been lonely lately. Not, “I have no one to hang out with” lonely. More like I don’t feel a strong sense of connectedness and belonging. This has made me self-focused and self-centered. I’ve spent more time feeling sorry for myself, thinking about what I wish I was getting from others instead of about what I could be giving. And this has led to some pretty epic fails on my part.
My shame gremlin sounds like a meaner version of Mushu from Mulan. (Hashtag Disney4Eva). “Dishonor! Dishonor on your whole family. Dishonor on you. Dishonor on your cow…” except more like, “This is why you’re lonely. Because you don’t deserve love and belonging. Because you suck.”
Yesterday I let my shame gremlin overwhelm me. It was one of those days when I went to bed at 8:00 simply because I couldn’t bear being conscious any longer. I woke up this morning feeling about the same and frankly, I don’t feel much better now, but I’m going to try to practice shame resilience. And I’m going to start by extending grace.
The thing about grace is, it’s always there for me if I just let myself receive it. The only thing standing between me and grace is my shame. I inked this word, “GRACE,” onto my body because I wanted it to mark me, but I still have trouble letting it pierce my heart.
When you’re not very good at something, the only way to get better is by practicing. So I’m practicing. I’m practicing extending grace. I’m saying, “It’s OK that you really messed up, here. You are already forgiven. You don’t have to beat yourself up about it. You can grow and you can learn from it. This does not affect your value or your worth.”
I’m still feeling pretty crappy. But that gremlin sounds a little quieter now. He’s still talking, but that doesn’t mean I have to listen.
March is over and spring seems to have officially arrived in Korea! I am linking up with Leigh Kramer for my monthly What I’m Into post.
What I’m Reading:
Mistborn #1:The Final Empireby Brandon Sanderson. I’m a big fan of Brandon Sanderson, but had not yet read his Mistborn trilogy. I tackled the first book this month and will probably delve into the second one in April. In a land where ash falls from the sky and mists envelop the night, a band of thieves plots to overthrow the Lord Ruler, the immortal king who has oppressed the people of for centuries. Kelsier is the tortured hero, leader of the band of thieves, and schemer who has designed an elaborate and perfect plan to overthrow the Lord Ruler using allomancy, the magic of metals. To complete his plan he needs the help of Vin, a street thief who has no idea the power she possesses. This book has solid characters, an interesting magic system, and a compelling plot line. It’s not Way of Kings, but it is still a really great fantasy book
Girl Meets Godby Lauren F. Winner. This is Winner’s first book and it explores her conversion from Orthodox Judaism to Christianity. Reading this was a strange experience for me since I read it after reading her more recent book Still: Notes on a Mid-Faith Crisis which I wrote about here).To be honest, I think reading these in reverse order probably affected my reactions to some of this book. Overall I liked it more than Still and I was really intrigued by all that she shared about Orthodox Judaism and the connections between the Jewish tradition and Christianity. However, reading it and knowing about her future struggles with Christianity and even her future divorce, I felt like I could see some foreshadowing in this book. One thing that’s interesting to note is that Winner converted to Orthodox Judaism in the first place. Her father was Jewish, but her mother was Christian. In the Jewish faith, Judaism is passed down by the mother, so Winner actually had to undergo an extensive process to formally convert to Orthodox Judaism. A few years later, after becoming convinced of the truth of Christianity, she uses a marriage and divorce metaphor to talk about her conversion. In one passage in particular, she speaks about leaving Judaism in terms of divorce and she says,
“If it was a marriage, me to Orthodox Judiaism, I failed long before I met up with Jesus. I failed from the beginning. You could say I became a Christian because Judaism had stopped working for me, but the truth is that I had not done very much to make Judaism work…
Sometimes divorce is the only thing to do. Sometimes it is the more loving thing to do. Sometimes, you have to do it.”
I don’t think these passages would have stood out to me so much if I didn’t know what came later for her. There are moments when it seems that faith is more a matter of choosing what she intellectually has decided is true than it is a matter of her choosing something she believes in with her heart as well and is something that greatly impacts how she lives her life. All of that to say, I thought the book was very interesting, but reading it after Still made me wonder if some of her more recent struggles are really larger patterns in her life.
Cinderby Marissa Meyer (This is only $2.99 for Kindle right now!) The stand-out book for me this month might just be Cinder. This is a YA book about a futuristic world where androids are essential to daily life and the moon has been colonized and become the home of a new species known as Lunars. This unique twist on the Cinderella story involves a cyborg/mechanic Cinderella, a handsome prince, and the search for a cure for the plague pandemic that is wiping out Earth’s population. This is not the sort of book I would normally gravitate towards, but it is so fresh and clever and well-done that I couldn’t put it down. Thanks to my friend, Karissa, whose positive reviews convinced me to give it a shot!
The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown. Brené Brown is a huge inspiration to me. I’ve written previously about her book, Daring Greatly, which explores the power of vulnerability and her two TED talks (here and here) are phenomenal. This is her book about wholeheartedness and what we need to live a wholehearted life. As most of you know, wholehearted is my OneWord for 2015. This book inspired and encouraged me in my journey towards wholeheartedness. Some of the material was already familiar to me because it was touched on in her other book or in her TED talks, but this book was still well worth the read. I will be blogging more in the near future about specific steps I am taking on my journey to embrace courage, compassion, and connection.
I’ve just started Barbara Brown Taylor’s An Altar in the World and I am GREATLY anticipating the release of Rachel Held Evans’ new book, Searching for Sunday, which comes out April 14th. If you’re a big reader (or even if you’re not) I would love to connect with you on Goodreads!
What I’m Watching:
This month I caught up/finished the current season of Nashville and Jonathan and I tried to stay current (with limited success because of internet troubles, so we are still behind) with New Girl, The Mindy Project, and Brooklyn Nine Nine. We also finished Broadchurch (amazing) and watched a few episodes each of The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, the new season of Community, and Fresh Off the Boat. I have to say, the standout for me so far is Fresh Off the Boat. I think I find it especially funny and accurate since my experience living in Asia.
We actually went to a lot of movies this month and were able to see Birdman (Jonathan liked it, I was ambivalent), Cinderella (I could die of happiness.This was so beautiful I never wanted it to end), and Insurgent (I like this about the same as the first movie minus Shailene Woodley’s amazing hair. I do really like her though. It was entertaining). Speaking of Shailene Woodley’s hair, we also watched The Spectacular Now which I thought was a really good, if unsettling movie.
What I’m Eating:
I recently tried out a zucchini apple muffin recipe that came out really well and is something I will make again. You know me and zucchini – I like to put zucchinis up in everything. I’ve also been obsessed with enchiladas lately. They are all I want to eat. Follow me on Pinterest for more of my favorite recipes!
Photo by: twopeasintheirpod.com Click image for link to the recipe.
On the Internets:
I loved this piece from Micha Boyett about choosing love and humility over rightness. I think Micha is such a beautiful writer and truth-speaker.
I appreciated this post from my friend Karissa about the differences between writing and blogging, something I’ve been struggling to sort out myself.
This stunning piece of prose by Addie Zierman that reminds us of the love of the father for the prodigal, even when he is still a long way off.
I loved this piece from my friend, Sara, about where our confidence comes from.
I actually really appreciated this interview from Angeline Jolie regarding her recent surgery to remove her ovaries, etc. after her double mastectomy last year. The story was completely sensationalized in the media, but I like her message about making sure women have all the information they need about their health and that they can feel empowered and in control of their bodies.
I loved this brief sermon from Nadia Bolz-Weber about that oh-so-famous verse, John 3:16. She really has a way of breathing new life into things that feel old and tired.
“God so loved this corrupt world of empires and victims and violence that God gave God’s self to us. God so loved the world that God came to us in the most vulnerable and fragile way possible. God so loved the world God created that God walked among us as love.
I love Mumford and Sons new single, “Believe” whose chorus, “I don’t even know if I believe,” might as well be my anthem most days. I think it’s a fantastic song, but I can’t pretend that I don’t miss the banjo. Something about the folksy bluegrass sound touches me in a way that electric guitars just don’t. (PS- don’t watch the video, it will make you motion sick!)
I had an article published over at Relevant.com about overcoming guilt in my sex life and did a follow-up post here. I wrote about not faking it til I make it and living authentically, about my recent struggle with anxiety, and about how judgement day might just be the best day of our lives.
I also continued my Friday Book Chat series with posts on my abandoned books shelf, my favorite mysteries, my favorite childhood books, and my guilty pleasure books. I also run a list of current Kindle deals that I’m aware of on books I’ve read or would like to read at the end of these posts.
What I’ve Been Up To:
Thinking back to the beginning of March feels like ages and ages ago. I feel like I’ve made a lot of changes this month. We started the new school year and I’ve been dealing with my interesting new co-teacher.
I got a tattoo (which I love! I already want another one), new glasses, and highlights (I don’t think I have any pictures of that, but I basically look the same just blonder).
New glasses. Total cost of the frames and top-quality lenses – $60. Go Korea!
My friends have been rocking at life lately.
My best friend got engaged and I got to help her pick out a wedding dress thanks to Google hangout and lots of pictures. Two of my friends announced pregnancies this month, both of which were somewhat surprising and completely exciting. My friend, Karissa is having a poetry chapbook published cause she’s just that awesome. And my friend Brett “Fish” Anderson published and launched his book i, churchwhich you should all buy and read and share with others now. Brett is passionate about the church and has a realistic view of the problems with it while also sharing hope and casting vision for what the church should be.
This was also the month that things became more definitive for us in terms of what comes next. Jonathan applied to a number of graduate school programs to do an MFA. These programs are incredibly small and selective and I am so tremendously proud of his work and his perseverance. After months of working, then waiting, then praying, we’ve arrived at a decision. (Drumroll, please!) We are moving back the US mid-August where Jonathan will be pursuing an MFA in Creative Writing (for fiction) at the University of South Carolina in Columbia. The paperwork isn’t in yet, but that’s our final step in making it official. And just to brag on him – this program received over a hundred fiction applicants and accepted four. FOUR, y’all. He is so freaking awesome.
I will be working full-time to support us, though I don’t know where or what I’ll be doing at this point. We’ve never been to Columbia, but are really pleased about it’s proximity to some of our closest friends, almost all of whom live somewhere in the Carolinas. We are full of excitement and anticipation for this new season, though it’s going to be a crazy ride. The earliest date we can possibly leave Korea is August 14th and school starts for Jonathan on August 20th. Best case scenario is that we will have about 4 days to find a place to live and get all of our stuff there from my parents house in Louisiana. It’s gonna be an adventure. Good thing we’re always up for those!
This week’s adventure is an ongoing adventure that started at the beginning of March, but this past week has been full of particularly good moments. For those of you who follow me on Facebook or Twitter or Instagram, you are probably familiar with my infamous Co-Teacher who I refer to simply as “CoT.” Many people have suggested that I start a Twitter or Tumblr or Instagram that is just for #stuffmycotsays. I’m open to the idea.
For those of you who wonder how I teach English to Korean elementary school students without speaking Korean, the answer is 1) lots of gesturing and using very simple words and 2) coteachers. In every class I teach I have a Korean coteacher. The coteacher’s role varies from class to class and person to person – in my 20 months of teaching in Korea I have had ten separate coteachers. Some have split teaching time with me, some have refused to let me do anything, some have refused to come to class and had me do everything, and some have more or less been in the room for classroom management purposes only. They have had different levels of English proficiency, different levels of interest in teaching English, and different levels of friendliness towards me.
Having experienced a wide variety of coteachers I feel qualified to say that current CoT is one of the weirdest people I’ve ever met, and it isn’t just because of language barriers or cultural differences or anything like that. I have been working with CoT since I started teaching in Korea, so we’ve known each other for 1 1/2 years. In the past, she was a homeroom teacher and I only taught 1 or 2 classes a week with her to her own homeroom class. This school year (which started in March) she became the head English teacher and I now teach all of the 3rd and 6th grade English classes with her. She also shares my office space with me and we sit next to each other any time that we aren’t teaching.
Some specifics about her: She is in her early 40’s and has been teaching for about 15 years. She begged for the English teacher position because she claims to very passionate about English education. Although some of our weird interactions could be attributed to the language barrier, I have worked with many Koreans with both higher and lower English levels than hers (hers is on the higher end, honestly) and have never had these kinds of interactions.
Now that you know where this is coming from, allow me to share some of my most favorite bits of conversation from the past few weeks:
I think CoT is actually a toddler:
I feel like if I look away for even one second she will destroy something. This morning I tried to show her how to use the Smart TV. As it was trying to warm up she pushed all of the buttons and promptly broke it. Then, I turn my back for on second while I was trying to figure out what she’d done and she takes the special pens that are designed to write electronically on the smart TV and tries to use them as erasers on the white board. I said, “Oh! Don’t do that. Those are special pens for the TV.” Then she picks up a dry erase marker and writes on the TV screen and uses the special pen to try and erase that. It’s 9 am and I am already exhausted.
No Time to Prepare:
CoT: I have cancelled the first week of classes because I had no time to prepare.
Me: Ok. Cool.
CoT; (finds ping pong paddles in giant mound of crap she has just moved into our office) Let’s play ping-pong together!
Me: Now? I thought you needed time to prepare?
CoT: Ok, not now. How about 20 minutes?
After cancelling classes the entire first week of school so that she could prepare:
Me: What is your plan for class today? (It starts in 20 minutes)
CoT: I have no plan
Me: Ok, well…it’s the first class of the year so I thought we should introduce ourselves. I prepared a ppt. Do you want to introduce yourself and explain the class rules?
CoT: I have no class rules.
Me: Ok, well do you want to introduce yourself and then I’ll just do the rest.
CoT: Good idea.
CoT Gets Up in my Biz
CoT: Are you sick? You look sick today.
Me: No, I feel fine.
CoT: I think maybe you’re not feeling well?
Me: No, I’m fine. Maybe I’m a little tired. I’ve been tired this week.
CoT: Oh. Are you pregnant? (hopefully)
Me: No
CoT: Are you sure? (with knowing smile)
Me: Yes, I’m positive.
CoT; Hmmm…. (smiling to herself like she thinks I’m lying)
Are you taking Vitamin C powder?
Me: No, but I take it when I’m sick. Right now I take a multivitamin
CoT: Is it a capsule?
Me: Yes
CoT: Mmmm…capsule is not good for your body
Me: Ok
I’m not pregnant, woman. I just gained weight. Mind your own biz.
CoT Gets Up in my Biz pt. 2
CoT: Oh, Li-lee. Oh Li-Lee. I think you have a lot of clothes.
Me: Oh. Ok. (Maybe I do, but I have 8 – 10 combinations that I wear to school on a rotating basis. So I wear the same thing once a week to once every two weeks).
CoT: Every day, a new color. I do like all of your colors.
(90% of my work wardrobe is black, white, or gray)
Now every day when she comes in in the morning she looks at me and simply says, “Oh. White. White, white, white, white, white. You are wearing white.”
I Don’t Think That Means What You Think It Means
We discuss what we will do in class and I write it on the board.
1. Review 2. Dictation quiz 3. Textbook page 16, etc.
The first class arrives 5 minutes early.
CoT, with no preamble, runs to the front of the room and says. “Number One: What grade are you in?”
The children look like they have no idea what is happening. Some students aren’t even there because class has not officially started yet. I figure she changed her mind about the order of things.
As she dictates, I erase the first two things on the board and switched them so it said 1. Dictation quiz 2. Review
CoT: No no! Change it back. Review first and then dictation.
Me: But you are doing the dictation first. Like, you are in the middle of it right now.
CoT: No, just REVIEW first and then we will do dictation. (Big smile)
(Turns around to the class) Number Three – I’m in the sixth grade.
CoT Decides Depression is Not Serious
(Out of nowhere) CoT: How do you feel when you’re depressed?
Me: When I’m depressed I just feel sad and like I don’t want to do anything and like my life has no meaning or purpose.
CoT (huge grin): Oh, I am glad to hear that! That doesn’t sound very serious!
CoT Discovers Spring, Apparently for the First Time
I am trying to prepare for a class that begins in 5 minutes and which CoT has prepared nothing for.
CoT: Lily (in sing-songy voice where my name suddenly has four syllables), please come look out the window. Me: At what?
CoT: The flowers are blooming. Please come look at them.
They weren’t blooming. The trees barely have buds on them.
Me (nicely): Well, they are almost blooming. That will be pretty (I try to go back to prepping for class)
CoT (whiniest voice ever): Oh, Why won’t you look out the window? They ARE blooming. They ARE blooming. And repeated that like 6 times.
The Wonders of Spring, Continued
Arriving back after teaching with a different teacher all morning. CoT seems to have been waiting for me.
CoT: Oh, you are here! (Immediately goes to the window, opens it and looks out) Oh look, The flowers are blooming. They ARE blooming. Look at them bloom. I can count the blooms. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. There are many flowers. Do you see them. Wow. Oh Wow. They are moving me. Do they touch you?
Do they move you? Are you touched?
I Am a Poet and I Don’t Know It
CoT: Wow! We had a fresh spring rain yesterday. So nice. So fresh. So many flowers.
Me: The rain was heavy last night. I don’t know why the flowers didn’t break off and fall to the ground.
CoT: Wow. Your words. They are so poetic. What you said just now. So poetic.
Hours later.
CoT: Say again what you said earlier. I want to write it down.
Me: (I don’t even remember what i said) Umm…I don’t know why the flowers didn’t break off and fall to the ground?
CoT: (Repeats this over and over then says) Wow, you are a poet. I am with another poet.
Be Poetic! Do It Now!
CoT: Oh, Lily, please say something beautiful. Like before. What you said. Like poetry.
Me: Well, I’m not really sure what would be beautiful to you. The things I said before were just normal things to say.
CoT: Say something. A sensitive, emotional thing. Like yesterday, you said there was a bee and a butterfly in the classroom and you said it was “like a zoo.” The “like a zoo” part. That was so impressive. I have never experienced this before.
A few hours later…
CoT: The flowers are pink. Light pink.
Me: Yep, baby pink.
CoT: (Chuckles delightedly.) Oh yes! Baby pink! It is so cute. Today’s word is baby pink! Baby pink with Lily!
Then she sat at her desk and repeated “Baby pink” 30 – 40 times.
CoT Gives Me Prompts
I begin to suspect that CoT is feeding me prompts in the hopes that I will say something poetic.
CoT: What do you think of human beings?
Me: ?????
CoT: Remember the time your friend came to visit almost two years ago?
Me: Yes, I remember.
CoT: Can you tell me about that?
There are more stories, but they involve more strange personal details about my CoT’s life that I’m not going to share publicly. From this sampling, I think you can see how every day is an adventure with CoT.
I started sharing some of my conversations with CoT as a way to help myself laugh at what can sometimes be annoying and difficult to deal with all day long. Many of our interactions are the kind of things that can be frustrating or difficult in the moment, but become very funny in the retelling. And seeing these interactions in a humorous way has really helped me let go of some of the frustrations I feel towards her and to honestly see her with a lot more compassion than I did before. Never knowing what to expect from her had been bringing me a lot of stress – I had come to dread being at work and was beginning to get snappy and short with her in our interactions and had gotten to the point where I really dreaded going to school. Like so many other aspects of life in a foreign culture, learning to look at things with humor and let the weirdness be funny instead of frustrating has been so helpful for my peace and sanity.
If you have an adventure to share, add your link to the link-up by clicking the button below. You can also click this button to read other bloggers’ adventures. You can participate in all of the adventures or you can just do a few – no pressure. If you missed last week’s adventure you can find it here. And if you are new to my Fifty-Two Weeks of Adventure project you can find out more about it here.
I like to think I have pretty good taste in books and that most of what I read is high quality (and let’s be honest, I want YOU to think I have really sophisticated taste in books), but I think we all have moments when we just need something light and breezy that doesn’t require too much of the reader. So basically, chick lit. I consider these my guilty-pleasure books. These are books that I know aren’t great literature – they are often predictable and formulaic, maybe even a bit silly, and they certainly don’t stay with me in any significant way –but every so often I just need a book like this to relax, unwind, and escape for a little while. I especially like to read these kinds of books after finishing a particularly long book or if I’ve been reading a lot of didactic non-fiction.
Even when I’m in the mood for something light and easy, the books I read still have to meet a certain internal standard. Sometimes a book is just too poorly written or the plot is too ridiculous for it to be enjoyable to me. I have abandoned quite a few beach reads because I found the prose to be distractingly bad or the main character unrelateable. That internal standard is different for everyone and it’s hard to pinpoint exactly where that line is, so instead of trying to explain my criteria, I’m just going to share some books (or writers) that have made the cut for me.
This list doesn’t include YA books (which I’ll do a separate post about) or humorous non-fiction (also a separate post). It also doesn’t include books in that difficult to pin-down genre that’s somewhere between chick lit and literary fiction (authors like Jennifer Weiner and Liane Moriarty whose books are much more complex and nuanced but still have an entertainment aspect to them that is typically lacking in more high-brow literary fiction).
As always, there is a list of Kindle books that are currently on sale at the bottom of this post.
Sophie Kinsella’s Shopaholic series. I’ve read a few of Kinsella’s other books as well (some written under the pen name Madeleine Wickham), but none enchanted me as much as her Shopaholic series. In spite of her frankly ridiculous escapades and the fact that everything works out perfectly in spite of her irresponsible choices, I couldn’t help being charmed by Becky Bloomwood. I loved that the series continued through her life. I haven’t read the latest installment, Shopaholic to the Stars, but all the previous ones have been lots of fun.
Emily Giffin’s books. Giffin’s books are a bit more nuanced than your typical rom-com (more-so than Kinsella’s at least), but are very fast and enjoyable reads. I will say that her first book, Something Borrowed (which was made into a movie a few years back), was problematic for me since it sort of justifies a situation where one character steals the other’s fiancé. The friendship dynamic was the most interesting part of that book, but it did irritate me the way the main character wanted to be with this guy regardless of the fact that he was unable to stand up and make a commitment. I enjoyed her subsequent books, Something Blue, Baby Proof, Heart of the Matter, Where We Belong, and Love the One You’re With, much more. My favorite was Heart of the Matter which deals with two women with little in common whose lives collide due to a tragic accident and is probably the least standard chick-lit of the bunch. I don’t recommend Giffin’s most recent book, The One & Only. I was really excited when it came out last year since I had enjoyed her previous books, but I couldn’t even finish this one. The prose was bad, the subject matter was kind of creepy, and the main character was obsessed with football, which didn’t easily endear her to me. If you stick with her other books though you should find some entertaining, quick reads.
The Rosie Project by Graeme Simsion. This was a completely delightful rom com. Socially awkward genetics professor, Don Tillman, embarks on a quest to find the empirically perfect wife for himself based on scientific facts. What he isn’t counting on is falling in love with a woman who doesn’t meet any of his criteria. There is a sequel to this out now, but I haven’t read it yet.
Where’d You Go, Bernadette by Maria Semple. This was such a fun, quirky, unpredictable book. Unlike most of my guilty pleasure books, this one isn’t really a romance. Instead it tells the story of 15-year-old Bee whose mother, Bernadette, is a once-renowned architect who has become a recluse. Bernadette is eccentric and unpredictable, but she is also Bee’s best friend. Bee is preparing to leave for boarding school, but first she and her family will take a long-anticipated trip to Antarctica. That is, until Bernadette disappears. Bee pieces together all the information she can find to figure out what happened to her mother.
Last Night at Chateau Marmont by Lauren Weisberger. Weisberger is best-known for writing The Devil Wears Prada, but this is my favorite book of hers. This book explores the dynamics of a marriage when one partner skyrockets to fame and fortune. People seemed to either love or hated this one. I enjoyed it.
The Nanny Diaries by Emma McLaughlin and Nicola Kraus. Maybe it’s just because I’ve been nanny and so could identify with a lot of the the situations in this book, but I really connected with this and enjoyed reading it. Follow Nanny as she stumbles into the world of Manhattan’s elite with an irrational boss and a 4 year old boy in tow.
Attachments by Rainbow Rowell. I read this book a few months ago and couldn’t help being charmed. A modern twist on the epistolary novel, this book is comprised of a series of emails between two best friends who work in the same office. When Lincoln is hired to keep tabs on employee use of the internet at work, he finds himself falling in love with a woman he only knows from reading her emails.
What are your favorite guilty-pleasure books? Leave a comment below!
Current Kindle Deals
*As of March 27th. I use the US Amazon site. Prices may vary on other sites.
New On Sale:
Cinder, Marissa Meyer ($2.99). This is a YA book, the first book of the Lunar Chronicles. It is a futuristic sort-of Cinderella story, except Cinderella is a cyborg and there’s a planet-wide pandemic. Just reading the synopsis, this is not the sort of book I would naturally gravitate toward, but it came highly recommended and I was impressed. It’s clever and imaginative and I couldn’t put it down.
Never Let Me Go, Kazuo Ishiguro ($2.99). This book is widely acclaimed. I just purchased this, but haven’t read it yet.
Name of the Wind, Patrick Rothfuss ($4.99) I’ve already talked about this like 7 times, but if you need a refresher, read the blurb on this post.
Still On Sale:
Station Eleven, Emily St. John Mandel ($2.99). Get it, get it, get it!!!!!! Read my review here.
A Prayer for Owen Meany, John Irving ($1.99) A classic. Many people list this in their all-time favorites.
Outlander, Diana Gabaldon ($1.99) I mentioned this series in my Books I Love to Hate post, but a lot of people disagree with me.
Wild by Cheryl Strayed ($4.40) You can read my review here.
The Bean Trees, Barbara Kingsolver ($4.99) One of my favorite writers. Kentucky native Taylor Greer tries to escape her roots but succeeds in collecting a 3-year-old native American girl along the way.
The Secret Life of Bees, Sue Monk Kidd ($3.99). There’s a reason this book is so popular. It’s great.
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Lily Ellyn 