New Year: My One Word for 2015 and Why I Can’t Leave 2014 Behind

In Korea people don’t stay up until midnight to ring in the New Year. Instead, they get up in the middle of the night and they hike a mountain. They climb through the dark, snowy pre-dawn hours and when they reach the top they stand with their faces to the sky to greet the first sunrise of the New Year.

What a contrast to how we in the West often enter the New Year – stumbling out of bed at noon, tired and quite possibly hungover. For many, January 1st is a day of recovery. We spend New Year’s Eve celebrating the ending of something and the beginning of a new thing. We bombard the internet with reflections on the previous year. Even the less introspective among us take a moment to declare the past year, “the best” or “the hardest” or “the craziest” year of their lives.

I can never bring myself to make those kinds of statements. Because I don’t believe a year can ever be just one thing. Life is never just one thing, and what is a year besides a microcosm of an entire life?

Elaine’s comment on my Year in Review post explained this perfectly. She said she was struck by “how every year is a little life – with birth, death, family, love, travel, new things, familiar things, difficulties and good friends all swirling through it.” I thought this was profound because of what it says about the year we’ve just lived and what it means for the year ahead.

2014 had a life that is both self-contained and part of a larger whole. Entering the New Year doesn’t mean we’ve finished with the old one. We can’t discard it like a worn-out pair of shoes. We carry our past years deep inside our bones. They make up the very DNA of our lives.

The person I was as a child is markedly different from the person I am today, but I could never say I’ve left her behind entirely. You never completely stop being the person you were at 8 or 18 or 28. You carry all of these selves inside of you and they shape who you become. In the same way, we each carry dozens of lives with us –the lives we lived in our previous years – and these lives become part of our future.

But carrying the past year with you doesn’t mean you have to be weighed down or shackled by it.

In the past, I’ve looked back on my previous year and made some promises. I’ve set goals for the year ahead that were largely lists of how I would do better, be better than I was the previous year. I used to think that doing this was a way of leaving the previous year behind, but maybe all that is is a way of letting the previous year enslave me.

I don’t think we have the choice to throw out the previous year or any year of our lives. But we do have a choice about how we let it shape our lives. I can either look at the previous year and allow my mistakes and disappointments and perfectionism drive me to guilt-ridden resolutions, or I can look at the previous year and simply embrace it all, both the proud moments and the parts I wish I could undo, thank God for them, and let them be part of my story.

This year, instead of making a list of resolutions, instead of thinking of all the ways I failed in the last year or all the things I want to do better, instead of making 2015 a giant to-do list, I’ve decided to join the many people I know who choose One Word. The idea of One Word is to get rid of your list and to choose just one word to focus on for a whole year. “One word that sums up who you want to be and how you want to live.”

I’ve been thinking about my word for several weeks. At first I thought about “Belief,” because it’s something I desperately want more of – in God, in myself, in the world. And then I thought about “Present,” the practice of being fully engaged where I am instead of constantly thinking of the next thing or the last thing. Both of these are important to me, but when I really considered what summed up who I want to be and how I want to live one word rose to the top. My word for this year is Wholehearted.

Wholehearted is about sincerity and commitment. For me this means authenticity in my life and my writing. It means commitment to continue my faith-wrestling and to asking sincere questions. Being Wholehearted is also a commitment to courage, compassion, and connection. It is the courage to be vulnerable despite the risk, the compassion to love other people well and to extend grace quickly, both to myself and to others, and the choice to develop genuine connections with others. Wholeheartedness means committing to being fully present, to showing up for every day of my life instead of checking out when things are hard or boring. It means engaging with Today and believing that every day is a gift. And Wholehearted means believing that I am worthy of love and belonging – not because there is anything especially great and deserving about me, but because we are all worthy of love and belonging and because we can’t fully accept love and belonging unless we believe we are worthy of it.

This year I want to step into the New Year with intention. I want to turn my face towards the sun and say, “I’m here. Whatever you have to offer, I am fully present and ready to receive it. The births and the deaths. The joys and the fears and the disappointments. The beauty and the brokenness. The faith and the doubt. The longing and the contentment. The adventure and the mundane.” May 2015 be a step on the journey towards Wholeheartedness.

Happy New Year.

 

Image Credit: Iamidaho at Deviantart.com

1,082 comments

  3. Hi Lily,
    Wow! I really loved your blog post and found it so inspiring. I don’t know whether you made it to Byron Bay while you were in Australia but it’s quite a thing to climb Mt Warning to see the sunrise. Cape Byron is Australia’s most Easterly point and therefore first to see the sunrise. I posted a photo of sunset at Byron Bay on my blog for the end of 2014.

    I personally struggle considerably with climbing mountains as I have a severe muscle wasting auto-immune disease and while I’m not in a wheelchair, climbing a mountain without using serious equipment is beyond me.

    The fact I could no longer climb mountains quite frankly annoyed me and even I might have climbed Australia’s tallest mountain (pancake) Mt Kosciusko as a child, I’ve never had any ambitions to climb a mountain until it wasn’t possible.

    The inspiration hit when my family was skiing and I decided to ski down the mountain instead and skied at Perisher, with assistance from the Disabled Winter Sports Association. It has meant the world to me.

    I agree with what you say about all our years being a part of us and I find it comical that people seem to think the 1st of January is somehow different to anything that has gone before. WE are not who we’ve been up until that point and somehow end up with a blank slate. I don’t think so.

    I really like your choice of “wholeheartedness” as your word for this year. My world will be love.
    That’s going to be so much harder than it sounds but after events which took place in the week before Christmas…the Lindy Siege here in Sydney, the Pakistan massacre and a mother murdering 8 children in her family in Cairns, the world needs a lot more love. Yet, loving people day in day out is a mighty challenge and not so fluffy as it seems.

    So thank you very much for your post and love to you and yours for 2015 and beyond!
    xx Rowena
    http://www.beyondtheflow.com

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    1. Rowena, thank you so much for sharing your story. I’m so sorry to hear about your illness, but to hear of how you’ve continued to LIVE to grow and change and try new things is beautiful and inspiring. Thank you.
      The world needs healing in so many ways and it might be a cliche, but I do think it starts with us. If we can’t love our families and friends and neighbors well, how can we possibly expect to love strangers, to love those who aren’t like us, to even love those who don’t love us. The cool (but also hard) thing about love is that it’s an action. It’s a verb – something we do, not just something we feel. It’s both challenging and inspiring to learn to love well.
      Thanks so much for your lovely comments. I’m so glad this post was meaningful to you. I hope 2015 is a year marked by love. Happy New Year!

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  6. Thank you for sharing, I do agree with you that all of our past years are brought with us. I really enjoyed your idea of one word vs. resolutions. However, I think that each new year, we feel as though it is a fresh start, not necessarily leaving everything behind and having a groundhog day restart. I know for myself, I do enjoy the new year’s, it marks a time to start again, just as your birthday, or any anniversary you celebrate. New Years is a time to embark on our past, present and future. There are some who are foolish with their lists and demands, and others that see it as a goal and something to work for. Either way, it’s important to understand that you are who you are because of your past, good and bad, and nothing can take that away from you. If you understand that, you can continue to grow as a person, as a mother, father, husband, wife, sister, brother, aunt, uncle, etc.

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    1. Yes, Rachel! Fresh starts (or times when we are especially mindful of fresh starts) are important to many people. I’m also one of those people who likes beginnings – a new school year, starting a new book, etc. and also find the idea of a clean slate appealing. I think the New Year is kind of “both” “and.” It’s the beginning of something new, but it’s also the continuation of something that’s already happening. I have a tendency to kid myself into thinking that on Day One with my clean slate I can suddenly change in all these significant ways. And of course, change is a gradual process. I also like to remind myself that every day can be a blank slate. It’s easy for me to fail at something and think, “I’ll have to start doing better at this next week” or next month or next year. When in reality we get to start over every single day. The previous day is a part of us, but it doesn’t define what today has to look like. But, I hear what you’re saying. I also enjoy New Year’s and I do use it as a time to restart – which is why I chose my word and started focusing on it for New Year’s. 🙂 I hope 2015 changes you in whatever ways you hope to grow.Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts. Happy New Year!

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    1. You’re welcome. I’m so glad it was inspiring to you. What more could I possibly ask for as a writer? 🙂 And thank you for the reblog as well. Happy New Year!

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    1. Selective amnesia. Exactly! Though I do think we get to choose how we let it affect us – whether we obsess over past mistakes or just accept that they happened and accept what we learned from them and keep living. Glad you enjoyed this post. Happy New Year!

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  12. Well, that sure is some fine writing we should all think about!
    Goodluck with your wholeheartedness and a happy newyear to you too! I’ll give myself a year to think about my word 🙂

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  14. Ive never really liked New Year in the way its celebrated here in the UK. The finality that is heaped upon us to move on and leave the year behind fills me with a sense that all my experiences of the last 12 months are undemined by the fact that ‘ah well,forget it all now,its a New Year!’ Hooray! And likewise, do we really need that particular point to reflect on usually the negative aspects of our year? Declartions of the worst year ever, or building up expectations from what was the best year ever? This year i took a light hearted look on what the last 12 months meant to me, instead of the aforementioned declarations. But most of all, 2014 gave me a year to improve on. My One Word is Embrace. X

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    1. I responded to the message linked to your reblog, but I’ll just add that I feel the same way about the finality of many New Year’s celebrations. I think it’s missing something fundamental about how we as humans are whole people whose life experiences are part of one long narrative and can’t be compartmentalized like a season on a TV sitcom. Thanks again for sharing. 🙂

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  15. Great message! I too did some thinking and decided that 2015 is going to be the best year of my entire life. Why? Because from each year I have learned and I am excited to walk in what I have found. Even hardship causes me to grow…every new year is the best year of my life!

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    1. I suppose you could say that EVERY new year can be the best year of your life if you look at it that way. Because every New Year you will have another year of experiences and growth behind you. Blessings in the coming year. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and Happy New Year!

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  16. The past can be painful and scary…but the experiences, if tendered with forgiveness and love can be the building blocks that turn an individual into a person who can forgive others and empower them to do the same. “you cannot have a testimony without a test first” Rev Linda Penewit

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    1. “You cannot have a testimony without a test first.” That’s really good. I think God is in the business of transforming things, making all things work together for good. Sometimes it’s a long process, not a snap of the fingers fix. But God uses circumstances in our lives to change our hearts and to help us grow. Thanks for reading and for sharing your thoughts. Happy New Year!

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    1. Thanks! I really like it to because it can be as broad or as narrow as you need it to be. You can focus on just one word and say, “I want to see how this impacts just this one specific part of my life,” or you can see how much it spills over into other parts of your life. I think another cool thing about One Word is that there are so many things in life that are unpredictable and that we have no control over, but choosing One Word to live by and focus on means that no matter what comes at us in the coming year, we’ve already chosen a way of responding. It feels very proactive to me. Anyway, I’m glad you enjoyed this. Thank you for sharing and Happy New Year!

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  20. Absolutely loved this post! You’ve definitely secured a new follower. In 2014′ I experienced things I waited my whole life to experience and I’m pretty sure I’ll be referring to some of the insightful things you mention here on my own blog. Thanks for the inspiration! Happy New Year.

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    1. I’m sorry to hear that. I hope you can live boldly in 2015 in spite of the pain and disappointments of last year. Thanks for reading and blessings on your new year!

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  22. I love what you mentioned about what they do in Korea! Everyone wants to leave the last year behind because they only remember the things that weren’t so great. I’m sure everyone grows and gets to know new things in that year. But if everyone had that word in mind, wholehearted, all the wars and problems in this world would disappear. If only those without a heart would find a way to mend it.

    Thank you for sharing, I really liked it. Happy New Year! 🙂

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    1. Thank you! I’m so glad you appreciated it. The cool thing about Joy is that you can choose it, you know? I mean, easier said than done (for me anyway), but the thing about joy is that it’s not dependent on our circumstances. It’s not about whether I feel happy about everything in my life right now. It’s about resting in a deeper peace and confidence that is there no matter what the circumstances are – you just have to choose it. And when you do, it can change everything! Thank you for sharing and Happy New Year!

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  25. Reblogged this on bigc2910 and commented:
    This is a unique take on how New Year can be less focused on letting go of the past and resolutions,more about embracing it all and choosing one word that you would wish to be significant in your life for the coming year. My word is Embrace x

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    1. The word “Embrace” always makes me think of “Welcome.” I think thats such a cool way to look at the new year. By Embracing your life you are saying, “Welcome,” to all that life has for you. I hope it’s a year so full of life that your arms can’t carry it all. 🙂 Thanks for sharing and thanks for the reblog!

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    1. Growth is such a great word because it’s also all-encompassing. We can grow in physical strength, in mental acuity, in our love for ourselves and others, in our compassion, in our spiritual journey, in our relationships, etc. etc. It’s also a cool word because I think it acknowledges that sometimes growth comes from uncomfortable or even hard situations. So Growth looks at the new year accepting that there will be challenges and already planning to see the beauty in them. I hope you look back on this year and see markers of the growth you are hoping for. Thanks so much for sharing and Happy New Year!

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    1. Thank you for sharing! Is foundations about being grounded for you? Having something solid to build your life on? It’s a less common word andI’m curious what it means to you. 🙂

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  30. Reading this article last night really made me think! I’m happy to say that I came up with my word as well; balance. So much goes on in our lives, it’s definitely an act that most people have a hard time perfecting.

    I love that this article really made me think

    Thank you! Happy new year 🙂

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    1. Balance, yes! Such an important part of life and yet so hard to achieve! Especially if you are a very passionate person and tend to go all in on whatever you’re doing. There are so many things to juggle in life, sometimes it feels impossible to keep all of those balls in the air at the same time. Might I also suggest that you give yourself a lot of grace while you seek balance. It’s like learning a new yoga pose – you’ll probably fall over a few times, but that doesn’t mean you’re not learning. 🙂 Thank you for sharing and Happy New Year!

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      1. Oh thank you & Happy New Year to you as well! Yes, i HAD to reblog it, such a beautiful way to welcome our new year. I, for one, am not your typical Western New Year’s partier. Although I have no mountain near by to climb, I do have a long street & a gorgeous view of pine trees & the sun. So, I’ve a new New Year’s tradtion, & one I’ve passed on to my 2 children. And it is all thanks to you. ❤️. I look forward to your future writings.

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  37. This is beautiful. If I may, I would join you in embracing the word and its sentiment and db hope that more people realize the importance of embracing their entire life experience. Good, bad, ugly, heartbreaking, each event shapes us into better people if we allow it. A blessed new year to you.

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  38. You’re so right! Everything we do or experience every day of every month of every year has brought us to our present so nothing is ever left behind or really forgotten. Definitely all about appreciation and looking back on the past and forward to the future is a great way to appreciate, but being present is the best way!

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    1. Yes, I agree! I’m not always very good at it, though. 🙂 It takes practice, I think, to be fully engaged in the present even as we appreciate the lessons of the past and plan for the future. Thanks for reading and Happy New Year!

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    1. Thank you! I appreciate it! My best advice is to keep on writing- the more you practice the better you’ll get – and to read writers you admire. Happy New Year! 🙂

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  48. Reblogged this on beyondtheflow and commented:
    Hi All, I found Lily’s New Year’s post truly inspirational. While I physically am unable to climb mountains, particularly in the dark, I did ski down the mountain two years running and that was also an incredible experience. While we can appreciate the solitude and reflection of this mountain tradition, Geoff also pointed out to me the joy of celebrating the new year as part of a community…coming together and I agree with that too.
    My word for 2015 is love. While that might seem rosy-coloured, it will involve a lot of hard work and climbing up many mountains. Being true to love is not an easy road xx Rowena

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    1. “And”! That’s brilliant, haha. Maybe the most unique word I’ve heard so far. I love it. What a great reminder to embrace all the parts of life and of this coming year. Thank you for sharing and Happy New Year!

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